-boy
by binaryShenanigans
Summary: ventus has raging crushes on his best friends, and he's decided it's time to be brave and lay it all on the line! but is a relationship really what he wants? features the word "cringey" unironically. in the gummiship fix it AU, aqua has been aged up to 20.


Ventus spent a long time looking at himself in the mirror. Checking meticulously for any imperfection in the way his clothes fell around his figure, the way his hair framed his face, any awkward twitch of his eyes when he smiled - and what he wasn't about to admit was that he was stalling. Luckily, in his bedroom, there was no one to call him out on the obvious fact that he w—

"Ven, you gotta stop freaking out like this," rasped a familiar voice from right behind Ventus.

Ah. Right.

Startled, Ventus couldn't help but whirl around a little too hard, overcorrecting his balance - betraying how deeply his anxiety ran this evening. The familiar voice that was sitting in the chair at his desk, legs casually crossed, simply let out a cackle, running one hand through his black hair. "Alright, Mr. Suave, it looks like you got everything taken care of, so I guess I'll just be heading out."

And, despite himself, Ventus protested.

"No! Just. Uh..." He stopped, barely believing what he'd just said, and looked down at his shoes, muttering "Look... I know we've never exactly gotten on well."

"Ya think?" Answered Vanitas, grinning mirthlessly.

"I'm STILL mad at you for breaking the cookie jar!" Ventus said, pouting a little. "What did you even have to gain from that?"

"It was funny," said Vanitas.

Ventus simply groaned. "We're getting off track here - what I'm trying to say is... I think I need some advice."

... Vanitas fell silent, his wild eyes calming a bit.

"Whoa. Okay," he said, handling Ventus very much like a dangerous animal, "Uh... Yeah, I probably can't help you much there, but... Yeah. Whatever. What's on your mind, sport?"

Rolling his eyes but deciding to brush Vanitas' constant rudeness under the rug for now, Ventus let out a sigh through his nose and began. "Well... There's this girl."

"Okay," said Vanitas.

"And a guy."

"Yeah, that sounds about right," Vanitas said, twirling slowly in the rolling chair. "There are, in fact, a girl and a guy living here with you, so it stands to reason that—"

"This is serious!" Ventus said, crossing his arms for a moment, and letting them drop to his sides with another sigh. This was gonna be a difficult conversation, he decided perhaps he should try a different approach. "So - say there's this hot girl, AND this hot guy, and you've known them for as long as you can remember..."

"Technically, I can relate," Vanitas cut in, still trying to joke his way through the issue, "Since, y'know. I've technically been around ever since you got here."

Ventus went on, "And... You've always liked them, like - y'know, in a kind of big brother/big sister way - but you get older, and that kinda... Changes?"

"And they change, am I right? Damn, those legs on Aqua," Vanitas snickered, making an hourglass gesture in the air with his fingers - one that technically, sort of, applied to Aqua and Terra, with those pecs of his.

Ventus didn't stop him there, as judging by the growing blush on his face, he saw no reason to disagree.

"I guess the point I'm trying to make is... I really, really like both of them. And I dunno what to do... At this point, I think I should just tell them, but I dunno, I don't really wanna ruin our friendship, you know?" He rubbed at the side of his neck, glancing over at the window.

Then, with absolute confidence, Vanitas said something that would make Ventus think back on this encounter for a very long time.

"Look, Ven. You may be this awkward, gangly, skinny, gangrenous, hideous, impossible-to-behold, abomination against nature, disgusting, ugly—"

"Uh huh," is all Ventus said as he dead-eyed his other half.

"Thing, but you've got a sort of advantage in this playing field called uhh, getting a girlfriend. And a boyfriend. Both at the same time, I won't judge — but you got an edge about you."

Ventus blinked, eyes widening slightly. "I... I do?"

"Yeah!" Vanitas leaned back in what was by cat logic now his chair, "The thing you got going for you is your age. Anybody their age would give literally ALL their limbs to have a teenage boyfriend. Cute little guy to hang on their arm and make googoo eyes up at 'em, and not know what taxes are..."

"I know what taxes are," said Ventus, feeling that his maturity was being insulted.

"Sure you do, Ven — see? You're off to a great start, look at that pout on your face! They're probably already crazy about it. You know how adults are."

Something weighed down in Ventus' stomach, but he wasn't sure what that something was.

Of course he knew how adults are! There's the wise, stern but kind Master Eraqus, and even though they're younger, there's the determined, cool Terra and the mature, generous Aqua, and they're all pretty cool to him. Ventus wondered for a moment what Vanitas meant...

In all honesty, Vanitas started to look a little sad after what he said. But he snapped out of it quickly, crossing his legs the other way and grinning. "I say you should go for it. Tonight. I think it'll end up in your favor, despite all the odds stacked against you. What do you say, Ven-Ven?"

Tonight? Aw, that's what Ventus was considering, but having someone else hold him to it kinda blew. He bit his lip, playing with one of the pockets on his pants...

"Tonight? Like — Right now?"

"Totally right now," said Vanitas, furrowing his brows a little. "Unless you're a baby."

"What?! I'm not a baby, I can totally do this."

Vanitas grinned as a dark corridor opened behind him. "Whatever you say. Well! Good luck, Ven." Then, he pushed himself with one foot backwards through the corridor and, with a flourish of black and purple, it closed.

Ventus, stunned, simply blinked and stared at where Vanitas used to be.

"... Vanitas, you took my chair."

—

Grumbling under his breath about how Vanitas BETTER give that chair back soon, it's his favorite, Ventus walked down the hall to one of the many staircases in the Land of Departure. The living room was downstairs, and at this hour, it's where Terra and Aqua were most likely to be. Master Eraqus usually preferred to turn in early, and he preferred that his pupils did the same, but he seemed to accept with a warm, older kindness that his pupils were young, and liked to stay up until they could stay up no longer. Surely he did the same thing when he was their age.

Ventus couldn't wait to be Terra and Aqua's age. An adult, so he could have so much more freedom, but still young, so he could enjoy it without too many crushing responsibilities. Yeah... That was gonna be the life.

Stumbling a bit over the last few steps, Ventus recovered quickly - he was a swift little lad - and managed to make his gait as smooth as possible before crossing the large open doorway into the living room where, as he predicted, Aqua and Terra were sitting on the couch by the lovely crystal coffee table on which their respective crafts were all set up.

Aqua with her glasswork, seemed to be chipping away at some kind of necklace, shaped like a long, colorful, drooping flower. Terra with his wooden projects, seemed to be chiseling into what Ven could only assume was one of his many good luck charms, this one visually resembling a spinning top.

They were in the midst of some casual conversation, he could tell by the way their voices tended to fall to a hush as his light footsteps drew near... That always bothered him, the way he never seemed to be part of those secret, intimate late-night talks. How he longed to be a part of their world... In more ways than just one.

As soon as they saw him, Aqua and Terra both smiled, though, so it was okay. Their smiles never felt forced or awkward, Ventus could tell they were always glad to see him.

Aqua said, "Hey there, Ven... What're you doing awake?"

"Couldn't sleep," Ventus chuckled, a little sheepish, as he rubbed the back of his neck. "I've... Kinda got a lot on my mind lately."

"Really," said Terra, putting down his good luck charm. He was always such a tender listener, always eager to show you with every ounce of his being that he was paying attention, and Ventus adored that. "You, uh... Wanna talk about it, or you just wanna hang out?"

Now that he was in the hot seat, as Aqua and Terra were sadly oblivious about right now, Ventus wished he could just forget what he came here to talk about, and just sit down on the floor with his friends and hang out. Talk about normal stuff that didn't put such awkward butterflies in his stomach, make late-night snacks for everyone...

But by the powers that be, Ventus wasn't a baby.

He came here to talk about a serious, adult matter - and he wasn't about to back out. Pausing a moment, he decided to take the plunge.

"Uh... Yeah, actually - this is something I wanna talk about with both of you."

Assuming the worst as she often did, Aqua frowned and finally followed suit with Terra, putting down the necklace. Had she done something to offend Ven or make him uncomfortable?

"Oh! Yeah, sure, what's up?" Terra asked, leaning back, both arms resting on the back of the couch. If he shared Aqua's worries, he was certainly better at hiding them.

"Yeah," said Aqua, putting on her very mature, adult voice, that 'I'm your mommy' voice, "We're here for you, Ven."

The problem was, Ventus wasn't Aqua's son. He was barely four years younger than her! She really needed to lighten up, all her stressing and mothering was starting to trouble him, especially given his feelings for her.

"Well..." He began, finding his gaze wandering to other things in the living room. Even if it was going to be a meandering, strange path ahead of him, he had to start walking it. "I think I just... Uh... You know — we're all best friends, of course, I just... I think... I. Like. You?"

Terra fell silent for a second.

"Well yeah, I like you too, Ven!" He said, smiling kindly. Too painfully kindly, a kindness that dug into Ventus' stomach like a knife.

"Well, yeah!" Aqua added, with a little giggle. She sympathized with how nervous Ventus seemed, though, and she hoped that laugh calmed him.

It didn't. Feeling the butterflies in there start fluttering, Ventus grit his teeth and said "No— that's not, exactly what I meant."

Starting to feel a sort of dread, Aqua answered, "Oh. Well... What do you mean, then?"

"No, I mean, uh... I LIKE you. Both of you, like. Like-like."

"Like like-like," Terra repeated, furrowing his brows a little as he nodded. Aqua glanced over at him, wild-eyed.

"Yeah! Like, uh." Ventus grinned, his own brows knitting upwards - he knew exactly how awkward this was, and it was only about to get much more awkward. "Like like-like... I dunno what to say. Aqua, Terra... You're the coolest people I know. There's nobody out there that's like you guys! You're cool, and smart, and nice, and funny, and... I wanna be with you. Both of you— I wanna do everything together. I wanna go out and explore with you, I wanna go on adventures with you, I wanna go on dates with you and treat you guys right, I wanna have my first kiss with you, I wanna... Do even more stuff with you... And..."

... Ven realized he was running out of words and becoming very red in the face as he realized he had just admitted he wanted to share his first time with these two. So too were Aqua and Terra blushing very brightly, but he figured that... Didn't quite mean the same thing for them as it did for him.

"... I. I just. I wanna be even closer with you guys. I dunno. I'm sorry, I know this is... Super cringey, but it's how I feel. And I can't back down from how I feel. So... Wh. What do you say? Will you go out with me?"

Aqua... Sat in silence for a moment, fixing her gaze on Ven's desperate grin, and finally she said, "Terra. No— Ven... Can I, uh. Can I get just a second with Terra alone here?"

That question hurt Ventus so much more than Aqua realized, but he managed to keep a straight face despite the stabbing pains in his stomach. "Oh! Sure. Yeah! Uh."

Aqua was suddenly on her feet, holding Terra's wrist, and pulling him after her out the doorway and down the hall, which confused Ventus, because he thought he was supposed to leave the room, not them.

What he didn't realize was that even Aqua wasn't quite sure of the order of operations here.

—

"Like LIKE-LIKE?" Aqua wheezed, holding her stomach as she paced back and forth in guest bedroom, breathlessly squeaking, "YEAH? LIKE-LIKE?" She was almost laughing, she was almost smiling, but the truth was, she was so overwhelmed by terror that she didn't know how to react.

Terra, who was often Aqua's rock when she couldn't be his, was sitting on the bed with his hands on his knees, and he said, "Aqua - I don't think this is as big a deal as you might think."

Ignoring him, Aqua went on, "What if we did this? What if I did this? Oh gods - did I do this? Did I make him think I liked him? I just wanted to be like — friends, I never wanted to be a girlfriend to him! Where did he even LEARN about sex?!"

"Aqua," Terra said, trying still to stabilize her, "Listen to me. You're not listening, just— hold on a second. I think you're overthinking this."

"But what if I'm not? What if I— What if I've been hitting on him and I haven't even realized it?" Aqua was thinking back on every little interaction she's had with Ventus over the past several years - the many times they've cuddled on the couch, the many times she's said 'I love you, the many times she's kissed him, the many times they've shared a bed, all of these perfectly innocent but intimate exchanges now starting to look very perverted in her mind. Was it wrong to be this close with your friends - the ones that were younger, like Ventus?

Even worse, she started to remember all the times she and Terra had gotten... Intimate recently. Were they too loud? Did they corrupt Ventus' innocence somehow, by letting him in on this secret adults share? Oh gods, were they monsters?

Terra sighed. He knew exactly what Aqua was thinking about, he knew she was spiraling - because he knew Aqua better than anyone. They were each other's confidants, each other's partners in crimes, they shared a best friendship that belonged to just the two of them. He loved Aqua very much, but this moment was a reminder to him that, just like him, Aqua was a flawed human being.

"I don't think you've been inappropriate with him," said Terra, "I think you're missing a really — important part of this whole situation."

"What? What am I missing?" Aqua asked, incredulous that she could be missing anything in the first place. With all this thinking she did, how could she miss something to think about?

But then Terra said, "You've gotta remember, Ven's not a tiny little kid anymore. He's growing up, and even though... Yes, he's younger than us, he's still starting to get curious about. Relationships and stuff like that. I was curious too when i was his age, I was curious when I was even younger than him. This isn't weird of him, we didn't... 'Make' him any sort of way. He's going through changes and he's dealing with those changes like any kid would."

... Oh. Aqua realized she maybe missed something, just a little bit.

Of course. Ven was a teenager, of course he would be interested in dating, and the ways of adults. He was going to become one soon, himself. Aqua thought back to when she was his age, which admittedly was harder for her than it was for Terra, and... She realized something a little sad - she was rarely curious about kissing or sex at that age. She was shy, and she was afraid of being weird - she only indulged her curiosities alone, not by talking to the kids around her about them. Was this a difference between boys and girls? Or... Was this a difference between what boys are told to be, and what girls are told to be?

Aqua looked a little embarrassed, to have jumped to all those morbid thoughts from before. This... Was awkward, sure. Maybe even a little painful. But it was natural, and it was nothing for anyone to be ashamed of. And there was an adult way to handle this, to set the boundaries she knows she and Terra wanted to set, without breaking Ventus' heart or shaming him for being a growing boy.

She sighed. "You're... You're right. I'm sorry. I wasn't thinking clearly, I got so caught up in my own worries about not being the right rolemodel for Ven that I just... Freaked out."

Terra grinned. "I think you'll find I'm capable of nuggets of wisdom from time to time." He and Aqua both laughed, relieved, but then he went on, "And I think... You're doing a fine job. It's clear enough he likes you, and I think - even though he might not admit it 'cause you're a girl, he wants to be just like you."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Aqua asked, chuckling.

"Boys are weird when they're growing up," Terra said, laughing a little, "But what I'm trying to say is, you're plenty good as a rolemodel. But it's okay to just be his friend sometimes, and stop worrying so much. You're not corrupting anything about him, you're being totally appropriate. You're just being you, and he's just being him."

It was hard for Aqua to internalize, but Terra was right... Ventus didn't need a mommy, just because she was an adult now and he wasn't. Ventus needed a friend, and maybe he missed the parts of Aqua he lost to her growing up before him.

Maybe there was a happy medium to be found here, between anxious parent and sleazy creep.

—

Ventus was sitting in the middle of the couch with his head hung when Aqua and Terra walked back to the living room. He sighed... He looked so ashamed of himself, Aqua felt bad for working herself up the way she did. But Terra placed one strong hand on her shoulder and knocked on the wall, smiling kindly, and he said, "Hey. Can we chat?", and Ventus looked up at them and smiled weakly, nodding, and... Suddenly she felt like everything was gonna be okay.

She could do this. They could both do this, and everyone was gonna have a happy ending.

Terra sat on one side of Ventus, and Aqua sat on the other. Ventus looked a little nervous, at first, but he just looked down at his feet and started muttering.

"I'm sorry I said all that... I went too far, I— I still mean what I said, but I don't wanna ruin our friendship either."

"You didn't ruin anything, Ven," said Aqua, resting her head on his shoulder. "And there's nothing wrong with the way you feel."

"I think just... Maybe it's not right for us," said Terra, putting one arm on the back of the couch, behind Ventus' head. "First off, you're a little too young for us."

Ventus frowned, furrowing his brows. "I'm 16," he said - he hated being treated like a child. It was one thing if they just didn't like-like him back, but to use his age as a reason to reject him was just mean. He was mature, and he was old enough for them!

"And we're 20," answered Terra. "That's quite the gap."

"It's just four years!" Ventus protested, starting to feel a little insulted. "Just four years, that's nothing if it's true love! Come on, what difference does it really make? I'll be 18 in two years, anyway."

"I know you will," said Aqua, lifting her head, a serious look on her face. "And we'll welcome you to the adult club with open arms, I just... Don't think it would be right to date you. Now, OR then. Four years might not be a lot in terms of amount, but... Four years is a lot of time for you. Four years ago, you were 12 - and you're a completely different person than you were then. For teenagers, four years is a whole lifetime of changes and growth..."

Ventus wanted to argue, but... He realized she was right about this one. He wanted to believe so badly that he was grown up enough for her and for Terra, but something about what she said made it click... Four years ago, he was mute, barely awake most of the time, and a very broken little kid. Back then, he could barely tie his shoes without help! Who's to say what kind of man he'll become in four years, when he's 20, just like these two?

Terra added, "But I don't think it's weird to get crushes on older people. I think teens get 'em all the time, it's totally natural. But... Think about where we are. It's like Aqua said, we were teenagers just a couple years ago, and even from 18 to 20, just two years... We're totally different people. We've grown a lot. There's a lot of changing phases in life for people that age, and I think crossing over with you just... Wouldn't be quite right."

Ventus stopped to think for a second. "Guys... If I was 20... Just. Think about it for a second. Would you wanna go out with me?"

Terra and Aqua glanced at each other. Well... That would be a very different situation, the circumstances of Ventus existing at all would be radically different, but it's purely hypothetical. It doesn't exist. So they decided...

"Does it really matter?" Aqua asked, rubbing the back of her neck. "What if I was an old grandma, and Terra was a baby, and the sky was purple? Would you still like us then?"

"What?! No, gross!" Ven cried out, which made Terra and Aqua crack up. Ven was a normal kid, alright. They had nothing to worry about.

"I think what does matter is... I dunno," said Terra, "I feel like I've learned a lot from you saying this. And I appreciate knowing. I appreciate that you trust us this much with something so personal to you. But I think at the end of the day, we're gonna say no."

"But we're still friends," said Aqua, running her fingers through Ven's hair with a warm smile. "I don't want that to ever change."

Ventus... Sighed a little. He couldn't let that slide, for a very important reason.

"But... We have changed," he said, and Aqua and Terra both frowned at him with concern. "Ever since you guys became adults, it's like there's this... Barrier between us. I miss how close we used to be, I miss being your equals. Now it feels like you're trying to be my mom and dad." Ventus made a little gagging face.

... Suddenly Aqua felt like she realized what was going on.

"Ven... I'm sorry about that. I didn't know we were doing that, but I think I see what you mean. I don't wanna make you feel like a baby anymore. I think... There's now a difference between us, and that won't change for a few years. But I don't want that difference to make us distant," she said, looking away. "I feel bad, that I've made us like this."

"You didn't mean any harm," Terra said with a reassuring smile as he reached over, behind Ven, to hold Aqua's hand... A gesture that was physically awkward with Ven between them, but it made Ven laugh. He didn't seem to feel weird about this anymore. "You just wanted to be a good grown-up."

"Yeah, I think I get it now," said Ven, "And I guess... Now that we've talked about this, I'm glad you don't wanna go out with me. I wouldn't go out with a 12 year old, anyway, that would be weird... But. I don't want a mom and dad, okay?" He looked down, looking rather lonely. "I want friends."

Seeing Ventus so earned made Aqua start to break down a little... Tears bubbling up in her eyes, she wrapped her arms around him. "I wanna be friends too, Ven. I wanna be best friends forever."

Terra in turn gripped the two of them in a tight, comforting bear hug, and the three of them were silent for a few seconds.

"... Hey. Ven, you wanna stay up with us?" Asked Terra, looking down at him. "We can make snacks and make a little crafting time out of it. You can bring your deck down and do readings for us."

"Really?" Asked Ven, wide eyed and grinning. "You want me to join the late night chats?!"

Aqua chuckled, having no idea until now how much that meant to him. "Of course! I think that'd be fun, the three of us just spending time together like that, no stuffy old Master Eraqus around, no training... Just us and those sandwiches you make."

Ven laughed a little, realizing what his body was doing after it was too late - he just nuzzled his head into Aqua's cheek, and then Terra's. They seemed a little startled by it, but before Ven started to feel embarrassed, Terra did the most amazing thing — holding both Ven and Aqua in his arms, with a mighty grunt he got to his feet and lifted both of them off the couch!

And, after that, everything was as it should have been. Ven rushed upstairs to grab his tarot deck - noting that his chair was back where it was supposed to be - and dashed back down, and found Aqua and Terra in the kitchen, gathering sandwich ingredients.

It was about as anti-awkward as it possibly could have been. It was the first of many late night hangouts the three of them shared not as an awkward, broken trio, but as best friends.

If only Vanitas had been there to share it with them, Ven thought...


End file.
